I mean, really.
I deserve it.
I can crush on people all I want.
Admire them to the end of the world and beyond.
And I can tell how bad it is by the stage I'm at.
Copying music is one of the first stages.
But it carries on throughout.
I'll probably listen to his music for the rest of my life.
Because I genuinely fall in love with it.
I change myself for these boys.
And I know damn well how stupid that is, but I do it anyway.
Over and over again.
And then I start to find little things about him.
Little things that drive me insane.
Like the way his hair sticks up in 7ooo directions and frizzes.
And how I would kill to fix it.
And how we match all the time, and I pretend that it bothers me.
And then I start to realize.
How we're practically the same people.
Which totally ruins the idea of opposites attracting, doesn't it?
And I start to lose people that are close to me.
Because I've gone too far, now.
But there's no stopping this.
It's a vicious cycle, and it's only begun.
But, anyway, my point?
I'm such a coward.
Do you know what I would give to be able to walk up to someone and say,
"Hey, would you go to the movies with me?"
Let me give you a little taste.
The fucking world.
But I can't do that.
Because I don't have the courage to even try it.
And thus, I hate myself for being pathetic.
Terribly Pathetic;;
++ Chels!`
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